2006 Chevron Confidence 1

To confidently show that you have lost all confidence.

  1. FS16
    A mid-00s pre-financial crisis piece of economy dreariness by the well known american automaker Chevron™.


    This all-new model features:
    - An I6, a compromise to your big ol' V8 libruls took away.
    - Handling about as sharp as your dreadful 2000s suburban lifestyle
    - More or less kind of ok MPG. Just like your marriage.
    - A design made by a stylist about as drunk as you are every evening wanting to end it all.
    - Everything cheap. Be careful with the buttons, they might break!


    Driving this car, you will experience the ultimate Chevron™ feeling. This includes:
    - You don't have to drive your kids anywhere. They are embarassed by your car and you.
    - Every time you pull into the parking lot, your inferiority complex reminds you that you are just a corporate wage slave earning money for your boss (who's driving an ETK).
    - Noone ever looks at you. Especially when you are in the car.
    - You remember your childhood bully, Brad. You are still sad.


    So come on down to your local Chevron™ dealer to check out this staple of suburban american post-9/11 depression™ and discuss financing with one of our partners!

    Starting at $18,000. You remember how you started saving that money planning to buy a sportscar. Guess what. It's Chevron™ time!®

    © 2006 by Chevron Motors Inc.

Recent Reviews

  1. tijojol10
    Version: 1
    like McRenault says, the description is pure gold
  2. McRenault
    Version: 1
    Haven't even driven it but the description is pure gold.
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